I don’t have this thing called life figured out one bit. I’d like to believe no one else does either. Regardless of our backgrounds, incomes, or ages, we are just trying to get through the day the best way we know how. And I believe that’s okay.
I’ve spent the better part of this year holding on to a love I’ve longed for for over 12 years. I came to realize that despite how much I loved him, he couldn’t (or wouldn’t) love me like I loved him. There’s nothing wrong with that at all. He can only love me to his capacity.
So, I decided to remove myself from the relationship. I figured that maybe I needed to spend a lot more time loving myself than I do other people. Not that I can’t love them too but I can’t pour from an empty cup. I pray daily to be rescued from the demons in my mind.
I tend to overthink every situation while keeping my emotions bottled up. This, of course, leads me to believe that I create many of my own problems and that I expect too much from others. I’m learning everyday though that I should expect nothing and appreciate everything. Nothing is promised nor permanent and that everyday should be lived with a grateful heart. These are the truths I know.
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